“Change The Locks”
And I know our relationship I neglected
So I’m hoping this apology you’ll accept it
And I know up in ya mind you feel disrespected
Just think about the time that you invested
But somewhere along the line we got disconnected
And you tell me I was wrong so I stand corrected
You ain’t up here in the mall girl I cant accept it
And so a woman scorned is what this man was left with
I got her feeling like no other option
Back against the wall love got her boxed in
Fighting with a hard love got her boxing
And all those bruises on her soul like she was fighting Hopkins
See I don’t want to love you anymore
And I don’t want to touch you anymore
I’m changin all tha locks that’s on this door
I used to give you every piece of me
Until you f*cked around and lost that key
I used to really love you now I think nothin of you
You ain’t gotta come back no more beacuse I’m gone.
See I was wit you
I split it wit you, I lived it wit you
Did it even when I didn’t wanna do it just to let you know I was different from the rest put an “s” on my chest
To relieve all your stress when I gave you my best
You betrayed what was left
And I didn’t understand now I’m leaving
– The song is by Jim Jones featuring Ashanti off his new album “Capo”. You can somewhat get a glimpse of Jone’s personal side and his girlfriend of six years Chrissy and Fabolous girlfriend of nine years Emily on their show “Love & Hip Hop”. I’ve mentioned the show on earlier posts. Don’t judge me, but there is something soooooo attractive about Jim Jones. I love his deep voice, his body and the way he talks lol. I don’t like the braids but he is one person that can pull it off because I am not sure how good he would look with out it. I also like his style, very laid back, simple and doesn’t put too much effort in but it still looks good. For some reason, I think a white or black tee, nice fitted jeans, nice pair of sneakers and a hat backwards goes a long way, it is so appealing to me. I also love seeing his softer side, they both of have said that he has never cheated on his girlfriend, they live together and he is so protective over her, they don’t have kids but he has a child from a previous relationship and he is proud of their relationship. On the show you can see how he respects her and values her opinions.
(a recent picture and a very rare sighting of Fab and his long time girlfriend Emily at her private birthday party last month)
Whereas Emily, Fabolous girlfriend he has been rumored to be cheating on her and is seen with different women and has kept her a secret from the public. Only admitting to be in a long term relationship when the birth of his son was announced. Everyone is curous about the two of them, he isn’t open about their relationship and she talks about how she feels her love and needs are neglected in the relationship on the reality show, she wonders if he will ever settle down and get married. Blogs even started to say that she is making up the relationship and they aren’t together anymore, she has laughed them off on her Twitter and he remains quite about it all. You really don’t know what is going on between them but it obviously seems to work for them. Emily has said that he is a different man when he’s at home and she wants him to differentiate between the rapper Fab who has a million girls in his videos and clubs and the boyfriend/father John who is loving at home. (his real name is John Jackson).
Here is an interview with Chrissy from Bitchielife.com:
We published an article about women proposing to men and it seemed the readers thought it made women look desperate or like the woman is rushing the man. You were bold enough to propose to your man. Why did you do it?
I did it to let him know that I love him enough and I am proud and happy enough to display that to the world. That’s what that’s about. Eventually, we will get married. Am I rushing it? No. Of course people have opinions about me asking him to marry me, but I felt it was the right thing to do. I love him enough and I wanted to share that. It’s how I felt and what I wanted. You need to know what you’re doing with your life. You need to have direction. If that thing doesn’t happen the traditional way, it still needs to happen. So why waste your time? I figured I would cut to the chase. What are we waiting for? There’s nothing wrong with me asking.
Do you feel upset that he never asked you first?
We talk about it a lot, so it’s not like it was something that wasn’t going to happen. We’ve talked and planned. We’re on the same page with it. I felt comfortable enough to ask him. It’s not like it was something that was never talked about and I jumped out the window with it. I knew that it was something we both wanted. I didn’t mind being the first one to step up. We’ve been together almost seven years.
What if he never commits to marrying you?
That’s something that I have to think about and deal with. I have to make a decision. This would be my advice to anyone: If you invest time with someone, it’s because you’re learning and getting to know them. If you’ve learned all you can learn about this person and you hit a brick wall, it’s time to move on. If you guys can constantly grow together, then it’s worth staying there for. When you’ve gotten all you can from your partner and you’re not satisfied, you move on. It’s up to you to figure out your breaking point. I don’t believe because I’ve invested time that I can’t walk away. I’m only walking away if I see that we can’t grow any further. If there’s nothing to look forward to, then you should leave.
Have you ever reached a breaking point with Jim?
When you think about it–what relationship are you going to find where you’ll be free of any of that. You trade in one set or bullshit for another set of bullshit. [laughs] It’s about finding the bullshit you can live with. Jimmy’s a good guy and he wants to see a smile on my face at all times. I can’t ask for anymore than that. There’s been time when our relationship wasn’t always on the same page. We had talks about it. We’ve realized that we’d rather be together dysfunctional, than apart. Relationships go through stages and you should always be learning and growing. When that stops, you have a problem.
Being that you’re with someone like Jim–on a higher level than the average Joe– do you feel you have to accept infidelity as a part of your relationship?
You should never ever accept it. Everybody has individual issues in relationships. Is that something that I want to deal with, absolutely not. Is that something I have dealt with with Jimmy, no. Am I a realist? Absolutely, but I don’t dwell on that type of stuff because it doesn’t come my way.
You’ve never had infidelity issues with Jim?
I can tell you on my life, not once. There’s no girls calling my phone, no one comes to my house, I don’t have it. We have other problems. We’re not problem-free, but that’s just one I don’t have.
That’s amazing because I know a lot of people probably assume…
Oh yeah! They think he’s the worst! He’s a flirt. Don’t get it twisted. He has fun flirting, but I don’t know how far it goes and I don’t look for it. It’s never come my way.
Being that you don’t look for it, are you a woman that is secure enough to know she doesn’t have to check her man’s email, phone and personal things?
I don’t want to do it. It’s not even about being secure. It’s a recipe for disaster because you can see something that’s innocent and if you’re looking for it your mind will tell you it’s something else. I stay away from that. If it’s something real, it will come out and it will come to me. Thus far, I don’t have that problem.
Are you waiting to have kids with Jim or is that happening soon?
Children are in the works. We’ll figure it all out.
Do you feel Love & Hip Hop has helped you solidify your presence in Jim’s life in your own mind or at least to the public?
I can’t really worry about the public because they’re going to have an opinion always–good, bad or indifferent. It allows him to view me in a light that is more respectful, you know what I mean? I’m out here hustling, so it’s going to be better for our household. There’s nothing like both of us bringing money home. It doesn’t validate me. I’ve always had validation in my relationship. He makes sure of that. We make decisions and life choices together. He respects my opinion and my mind. Now I want him to respect my bank account.
Speaking of–you said on the show that you didn’t work. So does Jim support you currently?
Yeah. He takes good care of me. I don’t care how people take it. I get flack all the time. He’s my man. What–you want him not to? I came up in a time when that’s what men did and aspire to do. What man doesn’t want to take care of his woman?
Do you think you’ll be able to secure an independent financial future?
I have before. My lifestyle has changed now. I was never a person that didn’t have anything. When I met Jimmy, I had my own apartment and car. He’s taken it to a bigger level. I’ll be fine.
How has dating Jim changed your life?
It’s taught me patience. It’s taught me that if you stick with something you believe in, then God makes great things happen.
In watching the show, I think you and Jim need a spin-off?
That’s where it started! [laughs] It was Jimmy’s show. He didn’t want to do a reality show. He didn’t like the idea of them putting him in positions and trying to make him respond to certain things. He wasn’t with the foolery. He shut down on them and told him he wasn’t doing it. I still wanted to do it and he told me that the only way he’d do the show was if they got other things for me to do because he didn’t want them on him all day. He told me he’d be there to support me. That’s when the ball started rolling on finding other girls to do the show. Initially, it was Jimmy’s.
What’s your life like outside Jim Jones?
Chrissy likes to be around friends and family. Chrissy likes to take care of her 70-pound dog who I think is my son. That’s my homie. I take care of my house. I do regular things. I’m trying to get into charity work for young girls at the age where they’re old enough to want to do it and too young to do anything about their lives. I think that’s a critical time when they need to be given the tools to make wise decisions. I want to get involved with that.
What do you want people to know about you so they can stop assuming?
I just want people to know I’m well-grounded. My head and my heart are in the right place. I’m a survivor. I’m resilient. I’m a complex person because I’ve seen so much and have lost so much in life; it’s going to take a lot to shake me. I want people to know I’m a solid person. What you see is what you get.